Meat Causes Cancer, World Hates Vegetarians

The World Health Organization announced Monday that processed meat definitely causes cancer. It has been officially proven by the most credited health source out there. True, the amount which bacon contributes to cancer is less than smoking, but it still DOES. Do you want a little cancer? Heck, people banned red M&Ms because of Red40! It is amazing how people hold on to their meat. Virtually nothing else in the world could be announced it CAUSES CANCER, and people find a way to dismiss it. Quick google search of "meat cancer World Health Organization."

"If meat causes cancer, what can we eat?"
"Eating red and processed meat isn't going to increase your risk of cancer by that much."
"The WHO links processed meat to cancer and vegetarians get smug on Twitter"

What about the "Let's stop eating meat" headlines?! What about those?! Instead, somehow, a blatant fact against meat becomes yet another way to rip on vegetarians, who, to be clear, only do the ABSENCE of a thing. Even Stephen Colbert knocked the vegetarians this week. I am so disappointed. He said "smug vegetarians" is redundant. Come on, dude, you're supposed to be a bastion of wisdom and social change, and instead you're a kicking a group of people who are only trying to make the world a better place.

I AM JUST SO CONFUSED. EVERYONE STOP EATING MEAT.