TV for Women

1. It's very easy to be critical of women-created/based TV shows. I was very critical of Girls for a second because it was such a bad example of women I thought the show was trying to represent. But, then I took a step back and had to realize this was just a gang of gals like any other gang on TV, and why I was ACTUALLY upset was because I wasn't being represented. It's not Lena Dunham's job to represent me on TV. It's her job to tell an interesting and entertaining story.

2. It's TV corporations' job to include equal male and female voices so that those stories start to show more diversity and thus represent more of our world so viewers who identify can feel as though they belong and viewers who don't can feel as though they understand others better.

3. I like Mindy Kaling a lot a lot, and I love her show. It's fun and quirky, and her character is sort of an idiot. "It sets women back." But also, again, it's not that one show's fault there are not other "setting women forward" shows.

4. In a recent interview she mentioned how she didn't intend to name the lead character after her true first name, but the producers wanted it. I wonder why that is? Is it because part of the show's appeal is that people love Mindy Kaling and they wouldn't be interested unless they thought it was her they'd be watching?

5. I realized many women on TV have had to take on their own similar to themselves personalities. Whitney Cummings, Amy Poehler, Tina Fey, Dunham, Zoe De. This is true for men as well at times (Seinfeld, Mullaney, Raymond). BUT, there are also a LOT of other men who have nothing to do with their true selves: John Hamm, Bryan Cranston, Steve Carell, etc.

6. Mindy's show almost never passes the Bechdel test. Yes, the protag is a 30something avergae-built Indian woman (yay diversity) but the next main supporting characters are four white men. Mindy had a bestie at the beginning of the show, and she was written out extremely quickly. Now it's just her and dudes basically.

7. Bisque went on a business trip last week. He came home and I said, "But it was kind of nice to be apart for a couple days, right?" He said, "Uh, no!" And I was like, "Yeah, but I took up a ton of bed space and watched whatever I wanted on TV!" He thought and said, "That's every night for me." And it's true. I don't really watch TV, so he controls the remote for the evening and I grade papers half looking on at what the case is this episode of Criminal Minds.

8. Today I did my usual Daily Burn workout and watched The Mindy Project. When Bisque is home I don't watch that show because I don't think it would interest him.

9. Sometimes I have watched Sex and the City with him nearby, and he sort of chuckles at the stupid drama happening. He has a point. It can be stupid. And then I feel kind of ashamed to be watching trash. But SATC is the closest thing I have to female Sopranos! Sometimes it's really good in a way I don't think Bisque will ever really understand...but I'm still embarrassed.

10. So. Why is there such a lack of TV shows featuring women and womens' interests? I think we are all part of the problem.

We All Talk About Girls

Sunday night Season Three of Girls premiered. Monday morning, despite it being my first day of school, I carved out half an hour in which to watch the first episode over my berries and walnuts.

Girls is important to me not just because I like it (I do), but because it is the great corral of my demographic: liberal women in their 20s. While Girls certainly does not reflect my demographic at large accurately (mainly racially and socio-economically), some aspects of Dunham's conception of my demographic transcend race/money/being fascinating in New York City. Every woman in her 20s not only connects with some aspect of Girls, every woman in her 20s connects with some aspect of Girls on a very deep, almost depressingly accurate level. So, Girls does speak to me truthfully. And, further, people might think it totally represents me. And as far as the dodos who think Girls is trying to completely encapsulate every single young woman in America, I want to know what people think is being allegedly said about "me."

More importantly, most importantly, we all talk about Girls. It is the show most of the women in my life have seen and have opinions about. When a new episode airs the internet goes 'nanners, sure, but in person all the ladies around are chattin' it up. Season Two was a let-down to many critics--especially males--because not much "happened." But don't you see? The fun of it is not the plot moving along. The fun of it is gabbing with girlfriends saying, "I liked that Marnie did that" and your pal saying, "I hated it. If I were her..." It's a conduit for conversations about femininity. It's a backbone. It's a shared source material.

A few years ago while my sister and I were jetting through Season Five of Sex and the City she told me that someone she knew lived in New York during SATC'S heyday. And that everyone was talking about it. Like, you could go to your hairdresser and discuss the ins and outs of Steve + Miranda. I remember being so jealous. I want an automatic TV book club! I want to talk about womanhood every week with friends and strangers! AND NOW MY DREAM IS REALIZED!

So, this makes me happy. Obvs. Then I realized it also makes me a wee bit sad because maybe the reason we all talk about Girls is because it's the one big feminist television oasis in a patriarchal Sahara. But, honestly, I'm going to chalk this one up as a win because shared culture is just the best, and there's time for gender diversity next year. Even when things aren't "right," there are silver linings, and it's important to be grateful for those. They may be gone when the tides turn.

High and Dry

Writing a play for high school girls. I have massive writer’s block, which is odd for me. But also, I’m just really grossly burnt out. I so don’t deserve to be. I just had fall break. This morning Ro stopped at home for a mid-morning cig and we sat on the back porch, her in work clothes, me in an over-sized Cosby sweater. It was like a game—“What stresses you out? This is what stresses me out.” And then we died laughing because we’re 20somethings just hanging out at 10 AM on a Thursday. How bad could it be? I mean, we recognized that, but then we paused, and all the grey stuff still hung over.

So, this writer’s block. High school girls. I plunged into some prime material: my old LiveJournal. It was just so sad. I mean, even when I was happy, it was still sad. This puddle of gloom, of “What will happen after this? This is all so fleeting.” College had umbrella’d since I was twelve. I clicked through other friends’ journals. None updated since 2006, 7. These kids stuck in cyberspace. And they were sad. So sad. Just like me! Girls I loved, girls I didn’t, girls I envied, girls who envied me. None of us were that different. But in each piddly little entry was a kind of hope. A hope that the writer was young and knew more was to come. Twinge of nostalgia for high school sure to end, but a feeling of relief that soon the confusion was over, the sad sack days were numbered.

Honestly, I liked high school, but I also grew up surrounded by TV and movies assuring me that growing up is supposed to feel like hell. At times it did, but that was apparently norms. College is more the mystery. Everyone I know went through some form of depression in college. But it wasn’t cute anymore. It's just wrong. "No one is supposed to feel this way anymore," you think. But deep down you know everybody does and this time it never ends.

Lena Dunham said in an interview last year that she created Girls to explore just what is wrong with youth culture. No one ever says they are happy when asked sincerely. For a while I took this as a challenge to be genuinely happy, and I think I was. I think I am. But it’s weird that the word “think” is in there.

Season Two of Girls (Spoilers)

This fall I was anti-Lena for two reasons:
1. The girl don't actually know what she's talking about. You can't write about being poor and cut-off in NY if YOUR PARENTS FUNDED A MOVIE POST-GRAD. But, I got over this. Because she's doing it well. So, like. I needed to get over that.
2. She's rocking best of both worlds. She's her character Hannah--totes love to hate and poster girl for single, awkward, fun 20s. But in real life, Lena is dating a dang rockstar. Again, cred is shot. What's with these females in TV and movies who are total messes who we can LOVE from our couches and laptops, but in real life are just as glamorous as the stars in People. They just have worse teeth or something, But, again, for me to mandate that Lena stay an unloved troll forever in order to please her fans? Not fair. I was particularly upset by the Donald Glover plot because I just kept thinking, "This is unfair. Donald Glover is way out of Hannah's league. This is not believable at all. You can't show a super-normal girl and ALSO have her nab all da hotties." But WOW, ALICE. That's on ME. Just because that's not "normal" now doesn't mean it can't be! And prolific artists need to be showing us  80% of what is and 20% of what SHOULD be.

-People keep wiggin' about Marnie + Charlie, but don't you see? He's never going to love her again. They are never ever ever. Getting back together. (For real at least).
-Hannah eatin' Cool Whip from the tub. It makes me feel solidarity yet jealousy that we both do this. (Lena Dunham is making a jajillion dollars from it.)
-I GD love Ray. Especially when he asks for a promotion to impress Shosh.
-Shosh was right on about him hating everything, and I can't wait for his transformation.
-Laughed out loud at Hannah's vmail to Jessa.
-"SHIRI OPERATE" was best part.
-Adam's new gf: it's unsettling and incredible that their scene made her normalcy absolutely putrid. I hope we see a little more of how she is warranted in her demands for respect.
-My heart was absolutely fluttering when Adam kicked down the door. Even though they're stupid together, sometimes impermanence is good for the time being. My editor tweeted yesterday, "For me the season finale of Girls was about making a bad decision, knowing it was a bad decision, but feeling good in that moment." And I so agree.
-So many people are so close to us, and, yet, the person who really tells you what's what is probably your ex-junkie neighbor.
-The credits rolled to fun. A nod to real life romance. I dig it. I do.

Ladies in Comedy

I just really want to express gratitude for the women of comedy being so important lately. All five Golden Globe nominees for female lead in comedic TV are like huge household names, so well-loved, and they all speak to womanhood and equality. Not a one is just working on her acting career. All five of them go out of their way to address issues of gender identity, success, empowerment.

I just browsed through past Golden Globe comedienne nominees and winners, and, let me tell you, things hava changed. Like, women on TV used to be funny...I guess? But, outside that, they were mainly just bein' pretty girls. I don't want to discredit any of these historic women or blame them. Some are significant--Carol Burnett, Tracey Ulman...sure. But Calista Flockheart, Jennifer Anniston, Jenna Elfman...what have you done for me lately? Sarah Jessica Parker, you are a symbol of your generation, of womanhood, of relationships in general...but what have you said?

These women are all a product of their times. Things are different now. There's tweeting to the masses and women's history month essay contests and a support system, which we ALL owe a pretty hefty thank you to Tina for. It's a new world, but we still owe thanks. I'm giving it. Thanks.

I do also realize that all the nominees were white, and I look forward to seeing even more progress regarding otherness in the future.