Only the Lonely

It's Saturday night and my dad's going to a party. My jobless, apartmentless, boyfriendless days are numbered which is pretty darn exciting with a little droplet of something else. What will I do tonight out in farmland by myself? It feels nice.

I made a brownie sundae and turn on Only the Lonely. It is perfect for new Chicago Alice. John Candy, all the Irish pride, shots of Lake Michigan and the skyline, Illinois Lottery pot emblems in windows, the el, and perhaps most importantly that sincere feel of 90s filmmaking.

At one point though John Candy re-musters his courage to pursue his dream girl after a friend of his dies with no family. Never got married, older sibling in a home, parents gone. This is a common trope thrown into movies/TV. Protagonist realizes might die alone, changes life. I obviously am sympathetic to this concern, but for once I'd like to see someone go, "Huh. Maybe I won't care if no one is around to make my funeral arrangements because I'll be dead, and I was happy until then." I mean, it's not the worst thing in the entire world to be alone sometimes. At least that's my attitude right now when I had a dessert for dinner and my night is still young.

Sunday night movie date with lady-prov post-rehearsal. 2012.

Halfway

I am officially halfway done with my MFA. It was a good semester.

Fall 2012 in 26 Snapshots

Pumpkin bagels on top of the crockpot.
John D. croonin' out my laptop speakers.
Imagining Slender Man in the corner, by my closet.
I'm in the corner, watching you kiss her. Oh-oh-oh.
Longform sets on the park blacktop. Planes overhead.
Grey running shorts. Orange spotted dress.
"We Are Never Getting Back Together."
Chickpeas in the food processor.
Sitting in the back row of Primary Colors with Hill.
Warm-ups with Barren Mind in a Santa Monica parking garage.
Riding my scooter to Los Favs.
Shy boy sitting on the MU stage holding a sign that says "Period."
Wearing combat boots.
Watching The Mindy Project while grading screenplays about sushi.
Ro sitting at my kitchen table.
Stretching in a circle of green improvisers.
American Horror Story discussions in the ed building basement.
"Ball is fine."
The red cover of Topdog/Underdog.
Miming skipping rocks on a railroad track in Wisconsin.
The sink in Ermo's office. The plastic mug on his desk.
The town lake bridge in lit blue.
Ru saying YOLO.
New squishy bicycle seat.
Pincushion sprawled across a sofa in the theatre building foyer.
Opening the door from a dark room to a woman holding two blankets.

Some Thoughts on Dating (Part III)

Recently realized a sexist thing I think. We all know ladies who date guys and then are hyper aware of their critical opinions. I'm not that way, but even I understand. Like when Kay and I took Poetry I together our sophomore years of college, and I valued his opinion more than anyone else's--despite him being in the bottom half of knowledgable (in terms of that class).

I was thinking about a friend of mine who is very talented, but the guy she's into has a completely different style than she does. Thus, he doesn't appreciate her work. Thus, she doesn't appreciate her work. Super annoying.

Then, I wondered if I knew guys like that, and I realized I have, but in my eyes they've always been victims of pushy and over-bearing girlfriends of doom. Uh oh. I subconsciously always blame the girl! Never fear, I  have been shocked out of my own backwards thinking, and I will go forward with more understanding that sometimes girls who conform have been manipulated and sometimes boys who have been manipulated need to grow more spine spindles.

Bug and Kale at improv rehearsal last Sunday. I took a picture because she looked like she stepped right out of an episode of Dawson's Creek on her way to Lillith Fair. But the ladies of my improv troupe accepted her ANYWAY.

I don't wanna wait for our lives to be over.

I wanna know right now what will it be?