Re-Thin

When my mother makes gingerbread cookies,
that dough is stretched so thin.
Partially because it's the one dough
I don't keep hacking gobs of. Partially
because no one likes a fat ginger kid.
Too tough. The front teeth sting.
The dough is stretched so thin.
I watch her--my mother--
work that rolling pin over and over,
she shoves her heft into the countertop.
I try to do it myself, but I can never get it like she can--
even though I'm supposed to be the spry one.
(Jillian Michaels, you know?)
Stretched so thin.
(I'm feeling stretched so thin,
which isn't new.
But I do it to fill all the spaces with love.
Real-ace love: chewy and substantial.
Fill all the spaces.)
You cut out a little boy, and you paint him over
with the milk brush, and you stick him
cinnamon drop buttons.
He's on the rack with his brothers. You pray
you won't burn anything.
Ever.
If you can help it. (Maybe even if you can't.)
The once-flat sheet is mangled with holes.
She smashes it
into a lump. Re-throw, re-roll, re-thin.
Re-start.

Treats: Birthday Oreo and Gingerbread Pop Tart Edition

Happy Birthday, Oreos! 100 years!


I seriously opened the bag, and it smelled like I had just pulled a yellow cake out of the oven. Plus, sprinkles.


Mega-thumbs up to the frosting frosting. It tasted like cake frosting. OM NOM NOM.

So. I also tried these gingerbread Pop-Tarts.


Cute lil winter gingerkids on the tarts. But, I notice immediately...there's no frosting. That's pretty bland, right?




Oh, I get it. The frosting is on the inside. So, let's be clear. There's no even PRETEND nutritional value here. Like, a regular strawberry Pop Tart is still probably bad for you, but there's something that's like fruit involved. No, this snack is just a crumbly ginger-flavored pocket of icing. But, they kinda tasted like seafood.


See? Food.


Yeah, you really shouldn't have fallen for that. And they actually didn't taste like seafood. Obvi.

Overall: Oreos--8/10, Pop Tarts--6/10
That's right. I am an artifically/factory-made dessert food critic now.

Crazy Stupid Love

As you may have been able to tell, I've had a rough patch lately. This are very good, but I'm just getting out of a creativity stalemate, some homesickness, some physical sickness. As of today, the storm on all fronts has passed, but I just want to give a shout-out to my immediate family for being such goofy supporters.

Some things--a very partial list:

1. My mom wrote this in an e-mail to me today:

"I love you, Sweetie! You are such a precious wonderful child/adult!"

Oh, MOMS.

2. It was Oreo's 100th birthday on Tuesday. I flipped a lid knowing there were special edition cookies out in the world that I had not tried. I called three major grocery stores in my area--no dice. I looked on Amazon and almost bought Oreos online, but before I got that crazy, I texted my dad asking if he'd check his local store. Yes, I'm a nut muffin. He found the dang Oreos. He sent them to me. He put a shipping track on them, and he texted me all week about the cookies' whereabouts until finally today, they were in my hot little hands.

3. While I was in bonkers-mode looking at desserts on Amazon, I found limited edition gingerbread Pop-Tarts. Obvi--not in season, but someone was selling some! I e-mailed my sister the link for her marveling eyes. Without saying anything, the box showed up at my house yesterday.



So...recap.

-I love limited edition stuff.
-Desserts are the way to my heart.
-Even though my family is all split up across the state of Illinois, they are united in loving me. I love them.
-Updates on the cookies and Tarts forthcoming. Just in case you're dying to know.
-Today has been a very good day.