Badlands

An interesting thing about the Badlands is that their namesake comes from people trying to settle in South Dakota. On maps you'd simply note "Bad land" because a bunch of rocks is pretty crummy land for your family bungalow.

But now many generations later, "Badlands" evokes many different connotations--very little of which are accusatory or critical of the geography. It is a place people go out of their way for. I know because I was one of these people, WHILE I WAS VERY HUNGRY no less. (Thus is the nature of family road trips--someone flouncing around with a camera while another someone stews angrily in the front seat. But ultimately we stopped at Wall Drug Store and I had half a maple donut plus a s'more ice cream cone, so things worked out.)

Names for My Technology

My first iPod: Frenchie

I bought her a bright pink case. It reminded me of Frenchie from Grease, the girl who accidentally dyes her hair pink in beauty school.

My second iPod: Abner

RIP French--you were hella buggy and froze a lot. The Apple store replaced you with a guy identical. Including the bugs. At the time (2005) my bff was KHo. She had an ex-bf named Andrew who I would always accidentally call Abner. We thought this was really really funny, especially after we figured out the pig in Hey Arnold! was named Abner.

My third iPod: Tootie

Abner died the first morning of Speech Nationals in 2006. Inconvenient much?! There went my pump-up jam playlists! When I replaced Abner, I named the new gal Tootie after a character in my Nationals speech.

MacBook: Bernadette Mac

I wanted something really official and special--like Bernadette Peters. Plus, when shortened, she became "Bernie Mac."

iPod Video: Troy Daniels

When Tootie bit it, I upgraded to a black Video. I was with Kay at the time, and he said I should name it Troy Daniels after a black kid he beat at water basketball who later went on to be a really good collegiate player. I thought this was a good idea.

iPod Shuffle: Calamity Jane

Isn't that a good name for a little pink thing that plays stuff at random?

Little iPod Shuffle: Rosemary

My dad got me a little silver thin shuffie in 2009. The model didn't last long. I listened to it a lot backstage of Summer Brave. I named it after my character.

New MacBook: Kurt

In memory of Kurt Vonnegut's death day (near when I got the new computer) and my favorite Glee character. Dur!

iPhone: Wright

Guide You Home

When I started to attend sleepaway camp, my mom bought a "Camp Stamp." You send away for a little rubber stamp with your name and phone number on it. It's non-washable and easier than conquering your kid's fat stack of garments and a Sharpie. Everything I ever brought to camp has my name and number in it. Now, of course, I don't wear most of the clothes I did as a camper, but there are a few things. A couple old sweatshirts, a towel here and there.

Years ago my mom and I were in disagreement about something. I can't remember what, but I know the issue had something to do with me wanting more freedom, and her wanting to check in on what I was doing. Maybe it was when I went to New York, and she wanted me to call her every night. It was something I didn't really mind, but it just seemed silly--being an adult and having to jump through an arbitrary hoop. I was arguing for my freedom, she for her rights as a mother, and then she said, "It's not like I'm asking you to write my name in your underpants or something!"

My mom has the same name as I do. So of course my answer was, "IT'S ALREADY THERE!"

It just occurred to me that the number is the landline from our old home. If I do lose something in the future, a nice person is going to try to return it to me and find a family who has no need for a purple cat washcloth.

Tears stream down your face
when you lose something you cannot replace.
Lights will guide you home
and ignite your bones.