Baby Reindeer

Saw my favorite show of Fringe last night. I am blown away. Before going I told myself it would be my last one, and indeed, it was. Yesterday morning and afternoon I saw wonderful acclaimed shows as well! But they were my 30th and 31st of the festival and while I loved them, my eyes were droopy and my brain was a little low-functioning.

A month of watching theatre of every genre and size and budget has been immensely inspiring. The world feels open again and it is reassuring to see my tastes is full form. Baby Reindeer being a bullseye for my dark and dysfunctional interest. I saw a different acclaimed show about mental health. Huge venue, stunning stage design, perfectly crafted. I can't deny it was "good" and the sell-out upon sell-out was deserved, but at the same time I didn't love it. I sensed something insincere, and I stand by my gut. The story was a perfect dramatic structure. Exposition, horrifying incident bulked up over a few months, dark night of the soul, a literal mountain to be climbed on stage--yes, recovery and it is finished. But when does wild, chaotic life serve us events in this way? I guess I don't mind artistic license, but

But this writer/performer kept no secrets. I knew it because even as the victim in his story he shared any hint of his culpability, the most twisted details (when no one would ever know otherwise). "Keep pushing" has been recurring coaching for me. From my college scene study to my graduate plays to notes here.

Anyway, the perfect final act. Thrilling and well-wrought and at midnight no less, so I could walk home alone in the pure dark considering all the horrid pieces of humanity.

I wish I had written in this blog more during this magical, complicated, brilliant, different, challenge of a month. I strayed from myself in many ways. I neglected my basics--morning journal, getting right out of bed, frugality, listening. I don't know why. I miss the norm. I will miss so much about this incredible fest, but I can't get home soon enough.